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Cooper & Kid E-Zine

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First, Get the Pancake cookies

All You Need Is Hot Water And Low Standards.

I’m a snob, and I’m cheap. It turns out, all by myself I’m the original odd couple. This is really the whole reason I started cooking. Because I couldn’t afford to eat Shrimp Pad Thai and Tiramisu twice a day when it’s made by people with legally mandated standards of hygiene. But even making my […]

First, Get the Pancake cookies

Why Are Crab Cakes So Damn Fancy?

Why are crab cakes so damn fancy? I may be outing myself, here, making bold with my dirt-farming plebian ancestry. But to me, crab cakes bespeak a certain toity of the hoity. You know, like if you were eating crab cakes you’d probably have to be wearing pants. But they’re just arthropods. They’re crickets of […]

First, Get the Pancake cookies

It’s Not Easy Cooking Green…Curry.

Alan Turing had Enigma. Ahab had the White Whale Smokey had the Bandit. And I have Thai Green Curry. Pursued, but never conquered…until now. Okay, so Smokey never did get the Bandit, Ahab never did get the whale (happened the other way around, I believe). But Grandmaster Turing did, through brilliance and persistence, crack Enigma. […]

First, Get the Pancake cookies

Girls Just Want To Have Lunch

Gleaning relationship advice from a mid-eighties Weird Al Yankovic song should, as a rule, not be policy. But in this case I think it’s worth considering.   Back in 1985 Cyndi Lauper corrected all assumptions to the contrary with the hit “Girls Just Want To Have Fun.” Which Weird Al redid as “Girls Just Want […]


When A Man Loves A Sandwich

You can love a salad, I guess. In the same way people love a pet tarantula, or South Dakota. You could love eggs over easy, but it would have to be that thing. That thing you do because, oh my god, you’re so quirky. But loving a sandwich? That’s like loving freedom. That comes as […]

First, Get the Pancake cookies

Here She Comes Now, Singin Mole Mole

The thing is, I love Mole. And not just because it’s chocolate and meat. Although, let’s be real, chocolate and meat, huh? Right? Right. My brother gave me a Rick Bayless cookbook a while back, which totally revolutionized my ideas of Mexican cuisine. And I’m thinking, I can cook, I love mole, I’mma make a […]

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Totes Goats (Goat Cheese That Is)

I’m not a man who’s easily impressed. I take that back. I’m very easily impressed. It’s a papa thing. When certain people sitting up by themselves, or pooping under (loosely) controlled circumstances gives you a sense of triumph, then any claims towards being jaded are no longer sustainable. Cheese, for example. I’m kinda blown away […]

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Eat It Like You Stole It.

Once I went to Italy. Like, real Italy, not Olive Garden Italy. I went to the Italy where you have to pay for your breadsticks…one way or another. But anyway, everything you’ve heard about food in Italy? Yes. I’m here to confirm that Italy does food like Catholicism does guilt. They have their peers, but […]

First, Get the Pancake cookies

Putting Pudding First

My Irish heritage dictates two maxims regarding dessert:   1. Most situations are improved by pudding. 2. Most situations are improved by whiskey.   Of course, like everything, these maxims can be taken too far. Too much whiskey, and/or too much pudding both lead to Christmas tears. But John Denver wrote enough songs to have […]

First, Get the Pancake cookies

On Etymology, Sharing Food and Yuletide Floundering

I’ll cop to it, gentle reader – I’m reaching this week. I had some fluff about sharing food, you know, with the Hanukkah and the Christmas and the Festivus and whatever. What do Cthulhu devotees do to celebrate the season, I wonder? Do they have special dishes for the season? Cthulhu Knish? Elder God Pudding? […]

Father's Day